Receive the Gift
Two days before Christmas. (Or as one of the kids joked: today is Christmas Adam, because Adam came before Eve. <Insert rim shot>) The kids are hyped. The parents are excited and already a little tired. Four Christmases worth of gifts are thoughtfully chosen, wrapped, and packed into every available space in the Suburban, along with food to share, extra bedding, wintery clothes, the extra table, Gabe's guitar, the Kitchenaid mixer. Also, the computer for photo editing. And the camping chairs, because seating is going to be an issue. Big family probs. My husband had the pleasure of playing Tetris in the back of the truck, but he got it all to fit, not without bewilderment at the sheer volume of items I wanted to take. "I just want to make good memories for the kids!" I told him when he questioned why on earth I was packing the icicle lights and spinning my wheels to do a thousand other things in my attempt to make this season memorable, hoping that my service will be seen as a gift and that I won't let exhaustion, unmet expectations or over-packed family car rides steal any of the joy.
I have not figured out how do to a simple Christmas. Is that even possible with five kids and extended family gatherings? We don't have a lot to spend, so there is no extravagance, and time is always in limited supply, and handmade gifts require just as much sacrifice. And I so love to give.
I don't feel like this is what God has in mind when He invites me to come and open His Gift and celebrate the good news of great joy that is for all the people. I have tried to make Jesus the center of our Christmas. The kids and I went through an Advent calendar, where we read prophecicies in the Old Testament about the coming Messiah and then the Scriptures in the New Testament that show their fulfillment in Jesus. We studied the names of Jesus: Immanuel, Lily of the Valley, Light of the World, Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. We packed Operation Christmas Child boxes, and we shared cookies with our neighbors with whom we are trying be intentional. We are opening up our home to family. Yet as we sit here in the bulging vehicle, eight hours of driving still ahead of us, I still feel like I haven't done it quite right.
Christmas is not about doing. It really is all about receiving. We have to stop doing long enough, be still long enough to receive His gift of Himself.
We don't do Christmas; we receive Christmas so we can give Christmas.
I just recently had this revelation about myself: I am the world's worst gift receiver. Just ask my husband. I woke one Sunday morning later than I intended, making it impossible for us to make it to the first church service like we had planned. Bring on the guilt. I had waited probably a day too late to get groceries, so breakfast for seven of us was going to be. . .interesting. I scrambled downstairs in a panic, because obviously I'd dropped the ball on the mom gig. I found my sweet husband not only putting together breakfast, but doing a lovely job of it. Toast and applesauce and poached eggs and other items from the pantry were thoughtfully prepared to give everyone a meal. Did I smile and thank him and let him serve me and the kids? Uh, no. Like a mad woman I proceeded to take over. I would like to blame the pre-coffee delerium and over-sleeping disorientation putting me out of my mind, but that was not the first time. So what did I communicate to my husband? Your gift isn't good enough, or you're not doing it right. Yikes. That is so not how I felt, but why should he even try if I'm just going to take over? Aren't I just a delight? Guilt makes wretched gift receivers of us all.
I'm Peter, refusing to let Jesus wash the filth from my feet.
Jesus himself said that it is more blessed to give than to receive (Acts 20:35). I do believe there is great joy in sacrificial giving, but He's not speaking of Himself as the Gift. Our giving is so limited if we have not first received the Gift of the Giver. If Martha had spent a little more time sitting at Jesus' feet like her sister Mary, then her gift of service would not have been so exasperating. She would have been giving out of His fullness instead of out of her own emptiness and weariness and limited strength.
Christmas is the greatest gift exchange ever. We give God our guilt, our weakness, our unworthiness. He takes them away forever and gives us His most priceless treasure, Jesus, where we find redemption, hope, strength, and great worth.
I am excited for our beloved kids to open the gifts we have prepared for them. Our hearts would ache if any of them did not receive them joyfully, worse, or if they thought they now owe us or have to pay us back.
We could never in a million years pay God back, so let's stop feeling gulity for not being good enough. We're not, but He is enough. Joyfully receive Him. Then out of His love, you can give love. Out of His strength, you can serve. Out of His abundance, you can give.
I have not figured out how do to a simple Christmas. Is that even possible with five kids and extended family gatherings? We don't have a lot to spend, so there is no extravagance, and time is always in limited supply, and handmade gifts require just as much sacrifice. And I so love to give.
I don't feel like this is what God has in mind when He invites me to come and open His Gift and celebrate the good news of great joy that is for all the people. I have tried to make Jesus the center of our Christmas. The kids and I went through an Advent calendar, where we read prophecicies in the Old Testament about the coming Messiah and then the Scriptures in the New Testament that show their fulfillment in Jesus. We studied the names of Jesus: Immanuel, Lily of the Valley, Light of the World, Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. We packed Operation Christmas Child boxes, and we shared cookies with our neighbors with whom we are trying be intentional. We are opening up our home to family. Yet as we sit here in the bulging vehicle, eight hours of driving still ahead of us, I still feel like I haven't done it quite right.
Christmas is not about doing. It really is all about receiving. We have to stop doing long enough, be still long enough to receive His gift of Himself.
We don't do Christmas; we receive Christmas so we can give Christmas.
I just recently had this revelation about myself: I am the world's worst gift receiver. Just ask my husband. I woke one Sunday morning later than I intended, making it impossible for us to make it to the first church service like we had planned. Bring on the guilt. I had waited probably a day too late to get groceries, so breakfast for seven of us was going to be. . .interesting. I scrambled downstairs in a panic, because obviously I'd dropped the ball on the mom gig. I found my sweet husband not only putting together breakfast, but doing a lovely job of it. Toast and applesauce and poached eggs and other items from the pantry were thoughtfully prepared to give everyone a meal. Did I smile and thank him and let him serve me and the kids? Uh, no. Like a mad woman I proceeded to take over. I would like to blame the pre-coffee delerium and over-sleeping disorientation putting me out of my mind, but that was not the first time. So what did I communicate to my husband? Your gift isn't good enough, or you're not doing it right. Yikes. That is so not how I felt, but why should he even try if I'm just going to take over? Aren't I just a delight? Guilt makes wretched gift receivers of us all.
I'm Peter, refusing to let Jesus wash the filth from my feet.
Jesus himself said that it is more blessed to give than to receive (Acts 20:35). I do believe there is great joy in sacrificial giving, but He's not speaking of Himself as the Gift. Our giving is so limited if we have not first received the Gift of the Giver. If Martha had spent a little more time sitting at Jesus' feet like her sister Mary, then her gift of service would not have been so exasperating. She would have been giving out of His fullness instead of out of her own emptiness and weariness and limited strength.
Christmas is the greatest gift exchange ever. We give God our guilt, our weakness, our unworthiness. He takes them away forever and gives us His most priceless treasure, Jesus, where we find redemption, hope, strength, and great worth.
I am excited for our beloved kids to open the gifts we have prepared for them. Our hearts would ache if any of them did not receive them joyfully, worse, or if they thought they now owe us or have to pay us back.
We could never in a million years pay God back, so let's stop feeling gulity for not being good enough. We're not, but He is enough. Joyfully receive Him. Then out of His love, you can give love. Out of His strength, you can serve. Out of His abundance, you can give.
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